Funny Statuses

I used to sell security alarms door to door, and I was really good at it. If no one was home, I would just leave a brochure on the kitchen table.
#17405
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Xyuppi
‪If you’re arguing loudly on your cell in public, please put it on speaker. I need to hear both side of the story. ‬
#17597
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Kristian Alekov
I never thought I’d reach a point in my life where my hands have consumed more alcohol than my mouth.
#17453
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Xyuppi
‪My ability to remember a song lyric from the 80’s far exceeds my ability to remember why I walked into the kitchen. ‬
The spread of the coronavirus is based on two factors. 1) How dense the population is. 2) How dense the population is.
#17567
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Kristian Alekov
I bet Canada feels like they are living in the apartment above a Meth Lab.
#17563
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Xyuppi
If 2020 had a flavor. It would be orange juice and toothpaste.
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