WTF Statuses

Gunpowder is just angry sand.
#17140
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Florida
Aliens probably ride past Earth and lock their doors.
80% of adulthood is just unsubscribing from emails you no longer wish to receive.
Since Facebook claims ownership of everything you post on their website I think I should start uploading my bills.
I have all the world's knowledge at the very tips of my fingers where I can find the answers to life's most perplexing questions! and here I am googling "What did Oscar the Grouch do if he overslept on trash day?"
#17150
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Xyuppi
I’m going to write a modern Christmas song called “baby is cold outside” it’s the story of a woman arguing with her husband about the thermostat
I think Rudolph's story got it all wrong. Usually it's the brown-nosers that end up in leadership roles.
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