Funny Status Ideas

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

Crazy people are harder to spot since bluetooth came out. Works out well for me.

When I find out that my friends have diarrhea, I tickle them.

My friend said the Chinese take care of aging family members. Hope so! Dropping the mother in law off with her suitcase at PF Chang's later.

It takes police too long to respond to 911 calls. If I get robbed I'm ordering Chinese food and asking them to bring a gun.

I had a dream about Rick Moranis last night. It was probably his biggest starring role since "Honey I blew up the kid."

They laughed at me when I said I wanted to be a comedian. Well, they're not laughing anymore.