Funny Status Ideas

I had to poop, but I was in the shower. All of the sudden I needed to fart really bad. I thought to myself sneak the fart out around the poop. Attempted previous thought. Turns out you can't get the black powder out of a gun without firing the bullet :(

Chewbacca is like an over-sized pekingese with an auto-tuner shoved in his throat.

Dancing With the Stars makes me question the meaning of the word "star". Apparently it's a synonym for "unemployed".

Gay guys still undress women with their eyes, but just so they can dress them back up in fabulous outfits.

Telling the entire country of Argentina not to cry for you seems a bit presumptuous.

I bet Waldo's parents are worried sick.

"Peeve" would be a great name for a pet.