Funny Status Ideas

"Lets just tell 'em we added another 'G' of speed." "Sounds good, see you guys next year." -Cell phone companies

My friend just told me I am one of the smartest people they know. I told them, "You need to meet more people."

They say you should just be yourself in a job interview, but what if you actually WANT the job?

The Libyan leader is dead...the attempt on Doc Brown's life has finally been avenged.

Technically, Humpty Dumpty died a crack head.

When sitting next to a McDonalds playland and a parent asks "Which one is yours?"The correct answer is NOT "I haven’t picked one out yet!"

Do people's maids take off the whole month of October? Everywhere I look, their houses are dirty with a ton of cobwebs.