Funny Status Ideas

I'm done learning new things until someone can prove to me that we won't have Google forever.

Bored? Test drive a Volkswagen Beetle for an afternoon, when schools are let out, and watch a bunch of kids punch each other.

I want to steal your phone and change my contact name to "Nature". Then, I'll call you.

Somehow, when she dresses up like a witch one night a year, it's sexy. But when she's a witch every other day of the year... nothing.

Halloween: The one night a year where we completely undo everything we've taught our kids about taking candy from strangers.

Facebook should have a limit on the number of times you can change your relationship status. After 3 or so it should default to "Unstable".

Halloween Tip: Before you say, "Great zombie costume!" make sure the person isn't just incredibly ugly.