Funny Status Ideas

You know that feeling when you walk into a room and forget why you went in the second you get there? That's the Sims player controlling you, cancelling your action.

My wife left me with my 6 year old and my 3 year old... and as if that's not bad enough, she left the 6 year old in charge.

No one is as disturbed as they should be by the fact that the prince in Snow White had to kiss a corpse in the middle of the woods surrounded by seven midgets.

Nothing you can ever accomplish will make your parents any happier than the first time you slept through the night.

I bet if Aquaman and Jesus had a fight, Jesus would walk all over him.

"Scent" is the sense most tied to memory. "Common" is the sense least tied to people.

If Lindsay Lohan goes to jail she will be sequestered from the prison population because the judge doesn’t want them getting a contact high.