Funny Status Ideas

I grew up with Motley Crue, Poison, Bon Jovi & Whitesnake. If I wanna see guys like that on TV nowadays, I have to watch RuPaul's Drag Race.

Sometimes I sneak up on my alarm when it's sleeping and yell "how does it feel!?"

The number one cause of losing your social life is a social networking site.

When writing the story of your life don't let everyone hold your pen...

Of course I talk to myself. It's the only way I can get intelligent responses.

My Grandma says "warsh" instead if "wash", "zink" instead of "sink" & "You're a disappointment" instead of "I love you." Old people are wacky

Not sure what age it happened, but I have officially gone from a Stud Muffin to a Bran Muffin.