Funny Status Ideas

No one speaks face-to-face anymore -- Tweeting, texting, Facebook'ing, emailing, voicemail. Shouldn't we call this 'anti' social media?

It's not that I'm a quiet person, it's just that I don't give a crap about what you're talking about.

I wear earbuds that aren't hooked up to anything just so people won't talk to me.

Some people might as well post "Wants Attention" as their facebook status.

Perfect girls are found at every corner of the earth... unfortunately, the earth is round.

Laughing for no reason is the best medicine, but if you are laughing for no reason do you really need medicine?

Dear genitals, thanks for not bleeding every month. Sincerely, a man