Funny Status Ideas

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result but I still get up every morning.

Trying to lose a little weight so my pants aren't so tight. Never thought I'd be trying to get into my own pants...

Football is the only time you can feel manly while wearing spandex capri pants.

Tonight I'm gonna party like it's 1999. (I stayed in and watched TV then too)

For some people, the cup is always half full. Like Lance Armstrong, for example.

Congrats to Lebron James for getting engaged. His fiance now leads the family with 1 ring.

Saying "your mom" is like the easiest joke...but then again..so is your mom.