Funny Status Ideas

My wife says I never take her anywhere expensive. So I took her to the gas station.

Whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr Dre.

I really don't like annoying people. Except for my girlfriend, I could annoy her all day long

Photoshop has made online dating like eating at Denny's: what you order bears no resemblance to what the photo looked like on the menu.

Project Runway star Tim Gunn said that he hasn’t had sex in 29 years. I had no idea he was married.

Cats make great pets, out of their owners...

If something were better than the leading brand, then it would be the leading brand.