Funny Status Ideas

Words with Friends would be more accurate if it was called Scrabble with a bunch of cheaters.

Math puns are the first sine of madness.

If my only two choices are go big or go home, I'm gonna go home.

Jesus may love you, but everyone else thinks you suck!

Dear 3 am, we've got to stop meeting this way... I'd much rather sleep with you.

Next time you're in a hospital elevator, calmly ask a stranger if they know what floor you should get off at for infectious diseases.

Actually, a lot more terrible minds think alike.