Funny Status Ideas

If people labeled themselves doctors as quickly as people labeled themselves writers, we'd all be dead.

Age has its advantages. Too bad I can't remember what they are.

There are some things you just shouldn't do for a Klondike Bar...

I live every day in fear of accidentally becoming an internet meme.

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I took the one less traveled by, and immediately regretted that decision as there weren't any gas stations.

I’m on this new diet called the stomach flu. I’m never hungry! And the weight is pouring off, I mean out of me.

You never know a person until you walk in their shoes... or until you check their browser history.