Funny Status Ideas

Don't get jealous if you see your Ex with someone else. Our parents always told us to give our used toys to the less fortunate

I haven't been this surprised that a quarterback got released since the cops let Ben Roethlisberger go.

If the tooth fairy isn't real, what the hell did my mom do with all my teeth?

Apparently Wi-Fi laptops can damage your sperm. In my experience, not as much as sperm can damage your Wi-Fi laptop.

Adele might set fire to rain... but SpongeBob can make a campfire under water.

If you order bubble wrap online, what is it surrounded in when it arrives?

Whenever I feel like I'm behind w/ technology, I remind myself that people are still calling radio stations to request songs.