Funny Status Ideas

Can I borrow a kiss? I promise I'll give it back.

If only The Dollar Store sold gasoline...

Long day. Can't wait to get home and curl up with a good The Internet.

If Facebook retains ownership of everything you post, I'm going to upload my debt...

Someone asked me "Who do you prefer, Chris Brown or Rihanna?" In hindsight, I shouldn't have replied, "Chris Brown beats Rihanna every time."

HD porn is so clear that you can actually see how disappointed their parents are.

Actually, the guy who paid for the first prostitute must've had the world's oldest profession.