Funny Status Ideas

I try to conduct myself as a perfect gentleman whenever I meet a lady. Chicks dig that.

Shopping for antiques won't make you gay, but it will make you buy curios.

I wish my lawn was emo. Then maybe it would cut itself.

If someone's Facebook picture is a car, should I assume that they are a transformer?

Ladies, if a man says he will fix it, he will. There's no need to remind him every 6 months about it.

I have just finished my research on the effect alcohol has on physical movement, the results were staggering.

A load of books just fell on my head, I've only got my shelf to blame