Funny Status Ideas

Struggling to get your spouse's attention? Just sit down and look comfortable.

With the rise of self-driving vehicles, it’s only a matter of time before we get a country song where a guy’s truck leaves him too.

Waterboarding at Guantanamo Bay sounds really fun if you don't know what either of those two things are.

Necromancers are just healers with bad timing.

I remember when I was a kid you could go to the store with 1 dollar and come home with 3 bags of chips, 2 candy bars and a cold drink. Now, they have cameras everywhere.

If you found your wife or husband on a dating website, it’s only romantic if it isn’t 3 years after you got married.

I had a happy childhood. My dad would put me inside a tire and then roll me down a hill. They were good years.