Funny Status Ideas

Went to watch some obscure foreign film called "Les Miserables" this weekend. They must have been giving away free tickets because the line was out the door! Anyway, the movie started and Wolverine was singing his guts out. Then Catwoman started crying and singing too. It was all very moving. The only problem was that the girl next to me who had apparently read the book or something, kept singing along, which was quite distracting. So Wolverine was on the run from the Gladiator, because Catwoman had a baby at Borat's house, but then she wanted Wolverine to care for her. Then other stuff happened and everyone died. Four stars!

So strange to not be getting any Dick on New Years. Clark, that is.

A police officer came up to me yesterday and said, "Where were you between four and six?" I said, "Kindergarten."

Its embarrassing that 90% of my Google history is just words I wasnt sure how to spell, and yes I Googled embarrassing.

When people go underwater in movies, I like to hold my breath and see if I would survived in that situation...Almost Died in Finding NEMO!

When I get a headache, I take 2 aspirins and keep away from children, just like the bottle says.

I don't know what I'd do without coffee, but it would probably be 25 to Life in the state penitentiary.