Funny Status Ideas

A blind Indian girl wanted me to touch her clothes to see how soft they were. I felt sari for her.

How do I tell someone that they have nice skin without sounding like I want to wear it?

Scent is the sense most tied to memory. "Common" is the sense least tied to people.

Women, if you want to strike a bit of fear into your man, just smile really big and ask him, "Notice anything different?"

Farts are just the ghosts of the things we eat.

I am never having kids. Everything they do is your fault...

I want to live life to the fullest. So much so, that the Westboro Baptist Church will picket my funeral.