Funny Status Ideas

I went for a 6 mile run tonight. The police are getting in much better shape these days

Hey, I said I'd be there in 10 minutes... Quit calling me every half hour.

I don't know how to sugarcoat this, but...you have diabetes.

Asking your stay-at-home wife what exactly she did all day is a fun way to bleed.

Marriage: I love you so much, I want a legal document to destroy you if you ever leave.

I finally overcame my fear of skinny dipping. Unfortunately it cost me my YMCA membership.

When I'm in a good mood I act like I'm I'm in a bad mood so nobody approaches me and ruins my good mood.