Funny Status Ideas

Do midgets still start their childhood stories off with, "When I was little"

Who decided to call them exes and not stalemates?

My 2017 resolution is to stop thinking so much about the future.

Where did Dr. Dre go to medical school?

I find the best way to get rid of headaches is to send them either to their rooms or outside to play.

I just did a week's worth of cardio after walking into a spider web.

This Labor Day let’s celebrate all the work we successfully avoided this year.