Funny Status Ideas

Golf is such a strange game. You shout four, shoot six, and write down five.

Had a good workout at the gym today. 50 reps on the bench press. Working my way up to actually putting weights on the bar.

The first rule of condescending club is really kinda complex and I don't think you'd understand it even if I explained it to you.

This year, for Halloween, I'm going to dress as a character from Scooby Doo and run around taking people's masks off.

I prefer to think of myself as a freelancer instead of unemployed.

Once and for all, I agree to ALL "the terms and conditions" that have or will ever exist!

The last couple of days I've been feeling really empty inside.....these new laxatives are working wonders!