Funny Status Ideas

If history repeats itself then I am SO getting a dinosaur.

I'm really tired after participating in the 5 centimeter charity run for ADHD.

Facebook game requests are like Herpes: They never go away no matter how much you want them to.

Bread bowls: The waffle cone of the soup world.

Strangers: "Excuse me please." Family: "Hey move!" Best friends: "Get the f*** out of my way!"

Has anyone with explosive diarrhea ever thought "you know, this time I'll go with normal strength Imodium."

I'll do a lot of things for money, but I draw the line at working...