Funny Status Ideas

I remember back when MySpace was my favorite website to visit. Now it's not even in my top 8.

History repeats itself everytime you say that quote.

It would be tragic irony if Michael Bay dies in an explosion.

I'm always making misstakes.

So Apple is gonna buy Beats by Dr. Dre... I guess "an apple a day keeps the doctor away" doesn't apply to technology?

If I ever get arrested I am going to ask for a status update instead of a phone call.

Happy Mothers Day. Thanks for the womb and board.