Funny Status Ideas

Michael Jackson's new album ain't bad

Never trust a person who speaks in absolutes.

My dog is entertained chasing his tail and I'm bored with a device that gives me access to infinite knowledge...

Punctuality is a waste of time since no one is ever there to appreciate it.

Tetherball is just a big cat toy for people.

I about punched my T.V. because I thought Kim Kardashian had a new reality show. I quickly realized I misunderstood what "Hoarders" implied.

Ikea: Legos for adults