Funny Status Ideas

I fart because it's the only gas I can afford.

I can't understand why women are okay that JCPenney has an older women's clothing line named, "Sag Harbor."

My favorite outdoor activity is going back inside.

The phrase, “Don’t take this the wrong way” has a zero percent success rate.

Sometimes my neighbors love my music so much that they invite the police to listen.

I don't use my cell phone in the car... I have to keep my hands free for making gestures.

I've been waxing my car for twenty years and I still don't know karate.