Funny Status Ideas

It’s interesting how the ads on Youtube never have trouble buffering

On average I spend $75 a year to watch bananas turn brown.

Every time I see a safety warning on a product I can't help think to myself how natural selection has failed us once again...

I wrote a song about a tortilla actually its more of a wrap.

How long have I been working here? Ever since they threatened to fire me.

I hate when I walk into the kitchen for food and only find ingredients.

Do you ever feel like a tampon? In a good place, just at the wrong time?