Funny Status Ideas

Every time I see a safety warning on a product I can't help think to myself how natural selection has failed us once again...

I wrote a song about a tortilla actually its more of a wrap.

How long have I been working here? Ever since they threatened to fire me.

I hate when I walk into the kitchen for food and only find ingredients.

Do you ever feel like a tampon? In a good place, just at the wrong time?

A recent earthquake has wiped out Etchisketchistan.

I’m still waiting for the episode of Storage Wars where there’s a homeless guy living in the unit.