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#12278
I show affection for my pets by holding them against me whispering "I love you" while they struggle to break free.
Funny
30
Insightful
3
WTF?
11
GTFO!
15
#12277
Pro tip for picking up girls - keep your back straight and lift with your legs.
Funny
30
Insightful
13
WTF?
13
GTFO!
29
#12276
Ariana Grande sounds like a Taco Bell combo meal.
Funny
39
Insightful
12
WTF?
15
GTFO!
39
#12275
When you say "9 out of 10 forest fires are caused by humans" all I hear is "There is a bear out there who knows how to use matches".
Funny
43
Insightful
9
WTF?
12
GTFO!
25
#12274
I just want to have Morgan Freeman read me bedtime stories.
Funny
23
Insightful
9
WTF?
16
GTFO!
21
#12273
I bet giraffes never get stuck smelling their own farts.
Funny
18
Insightful
6
WTF?
7
GTFO!
16
#12272
Novell
I think my mailman is stealing my Nigerian lottery checks
Funny
33
Insightful
5
WTF?
15
GTFO!
17
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