Funny Status Ideas

I just want a reason to dramatically slide across the hood of a car.

Until public restrooms have automatic doors, the automatic sinks, soap and paper towel dispenser will make no sense to me.

I'm willing to bet very few women would appreciate the humor of giving birth on Labor Day, ya know, at the time.

Cashiers are always checking me out.

I think my car horn should sound like gunshots..... I bet you'll move then.

I knew the Psychic was no good the moment she accepted my check

Wine doesn't have many vitamins. That's why you have to drink a lot of it.