Funny Status Ideas

In Ancient Rome, there were 4 types of poison. Poisons I, II, and III would all kill you with varying degrees of pain. However, Poison IV would just make you really itchy.

It was Hope Hicks, in the Rose garden, with the virus

I looked at the keyboard earlier and I noticed 'U' & 'I' are together...it's meant to be! Then I looked underneath it and it said JK.

The winner of the first Presidential debate is...Tylenol Extra Strength!

As chickens are descended from dinosaurs, dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets must be the ultimate mockery of what their lineage has become.

I am not turning my clock back on November 1st, I do not need another hour of 2020.

One of my daughters wants to marry the mailman, but I won’t letter!