Funny Status Ideas

Making a boat out of stone would be a hardship.

So my best friend when I was a kid was Andy Zoff. He was the fastest boy at my school.

Teens don't know how good they have it with lyrics sites. We used to have to sing the wrong crap for years until the truth destroyed us.

Without a doubt, the cashew is my favorite nut that sounds like a sneeze.

Kids are fun, but I prefer playing with the package they came in.

When I say “I hate drama” I mean I hate being involved in drama. Other people’s drama? Big fan.

Studies show the most expensive vehicle to operate is a Costco shopping cart.