Funny Status Ideas

I had plant based mashed potatoes last night. Tasted like the real thing.

Went into a five-star hotel to use the bathroom and now it's a two-star hotel.

Fuel prices are so high that I went to the car dealership and test drove 3 cars to run my errands.

When I was younger I always wondered what the big attraction was to staying up all night. Then it dawned on me.

I wonder what the part of my brain, that used to store telephone numbers, is doing nowadays...

Teachers are not "Off for the summer", they are in recovery. ‬

Johnny Depp gets 15 million dollars for being with a nut job. And all these years I've been doing it for free!