Funny Status Ideas

I'm not saying you shouldn't trust the internet, but there's an alarming discrepancy between the number of iPads I've won & the number of iPads I own.

The guy who named the "Chimichanga" should really be given more authority to name things

If the chemical symbol for water is H2O... is the chemical symbol for holy water H2Omg?

William Shatner has discontinued his new line of ladies lingerie. Apparently "Shatner Panties" wasn't the best choice for a name.

I know a guy who opened a bar for men with erectile dysfunction. It was a total flop. Nobody came.

Don't expect me to stop if you break down on the road. I'm sure that you were warned about your car's warranty expiring.

When Vanna White passes away, her family will get a lot of touching letters.