Funny Status Ideas

I like to spend Monday morning trying to remember what I was avoiding doing at work on Friday.

I'm always right, never wrong. One time I thought I was wrong, but I was wrong.

If Santa's helper takes a picture in the mirror, is that an elfie?

I can't believe I used to think that people my age were adults

"Mail your packages early so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas."

Dammit, that's the last time I open the fridge before knocking. Who knew there was a salad dressing?

We're in for such a cold winter this year that the squirrels are collecting more "nuts" than usual and so far 3 of my neighbors have disappeared..... Are you all OK?