Funny Status Ideas

I've been told that when you meet the right person you would know immediately. Then how come you meet wrong person. It takes a year and a half ?

To all the parents out there, think about the initials before naming your kids...my friend Patricia Michelle Smith will thank you.

Hey Parents : Remember to tell your kids, whatever Santa brings in December the Easter bunny can take away in Spring. Guarantees good behavior at least 'till April!

I should open a sex shop called Sporting's Dick Goods.

I know my limits. I don’t pay any attention to them, but I know them

Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

As a kid, I had to be careful not to curse around adults. Now as an adult, I have to be careful not to curse around kids.