Funny Status Ideas

Just saw a guy using a payphone. I can only assume he’s being told where to deliver the ransom money.

I support recycling, I wore this shirt yesterday.

I would like to offer moral support but I have questionable morals.

You know you are getting old when a bunch of annoying teenagers get murdered in a horror movie and you relate more with the killer.

Now they are saying that the Zika virus is sexually transmittable. What kind of pervert is having sex with a mosquito?

I Love you more than Kanye loves Kanye.

When I die, I want a cellphone in my coffin...just in case