Funny Status Ideas

Saturday mornings without cartoons is now officially called "Sadurday"

There was a glorious time, before social media, when you would just lose touch with people.

People who try to test my patience don't realize it's an exam I don't plan on passing.

Happy Leap Year Day (Leap Day?) to everyone! Or, as the military calls it "Shoulda been Payday".

I went to see the doctor today for my annual check-up. The good news is the he says I'm healthy as a horse. The bad news is he uses large farm animals to describe me.

Yesterday I accidentally swallowed a bottle of food coloring. The doctor says I'm OK, but I feel like I've dyed a little inside.

If the number 2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still number 2?