Funny Status Ideas

I'm combining Easter and April Fools day this year - I'm sending the kids out to look for eggs I haven't hidden.

Earn extra cash from superstitious strangers by placing a wishing well in your front garden.

If you say the word "douche" fast and repetitive, it will sound like the beat of a techno song.

You know you're non-domesticated when the only reason you finally transfer the dishes from the sink to the dishwasher is so you can gain access to the garbage disposal.

Having a bit of a lazy day...sitting in my underwear looking for jobs online. My boss doesn't look amused

I will never repeat filthy rumors. So listen closely the first time.

I bet that in prison, everyone's relationship status is set to "it's complicated.