Funny Status Ideas

Finally, my winter fat is gone, now all I have are spring rolls.

My boss told me that he will be leaving work early today.... What a coincidence! So am I!

If you answer the phone and say "Hello, you're on the air." most telemarketers will hang up quickly.

USB sounds like a backup in case the USA fails.

Over half the contacts in my phone are named “Do Not Answer”

Whats my favorite childhood memory? Not paying bills.

The key to eating healthy is to avoid any food that has a TV commercial.