Funny Status Ideas

I can cope with voices in my head but the voices outside my head drive me crazy.

Sometimes I buy huge pants and take a picture of myself holding them up just to feel like I lost a ton of weight.

As long as there is an open textbook in front of you, nobody will question what you are doing on your laptop.

I wish juice boxes were more socially acceptable.

All the desirable things in life are either illegal, expensive or married.

Rest areas restroom are weird. The guy in stall next to me has four feet.

I didn't see anyone important yesterday, so I'll probably wear these same clothes today.