Funny Status Ideas

Went into a five-star hotel to use the bathroom and now it's a two-star hotel.

The only government agency that listens to you is the NSA.

It takes a lot of balls to golf the way I do.

Scientists have recently discovered that approximately 2% of Earth's water at any given time is found on Tupperware containers being removed from the dishwasher!

If you have a dog grooming business and it’s not called “Doggie Style” then something is wrong with you.

We live in a world where lemonade is made from artificial flavors and furniture polish is made from real lemons.

The fact there’s a highway to hell and only a stairway to heaven says a lot about anticipated traffic numbers.