Funny Status Ideas

If I owned a copy store I would only hire identical twins.

The entire purpose of a bayonet is to bring a knife to a gun fight.

Despite the old saying, "Don't take your troubles to bed," many women still sleep with their husbands.

Cops are allowed to tell women they have the right to remain silent, but when I do it I wind up with a fork in my leg.

My friend wants to meet someone the old fashioned way, so I'm considering offering 2 cows and some fine china to a man she doesn't know if he agreed to take care of her.

I say ” I shouldn’t be telling you this,” at the beginning of every conversation so people will listen to what I’m saying.

Every time I eat Chinese I feel like I weigh won ton.