Funny Status Ideas

I just want to be rich enough to be referred to as eccentric instead of crazy.

˙ʇuǝpıɔɔɐ ʎq pɹɐoqʎǝʞ uɐıןɐɹʇsnɐ uɐ ʇɥbnoq ı dןǝɥ

I just saved a ton of money on Christmas presents by discussing politics on Facebook.

If I bought my balloon a 5 years ago for $1, how much could I sell it for when I adjust for inflation?

‪I have removed all the unhealthy food from my house. It was delicious. ‬

I really would like to take you to the movies. I will drop you off at 8 and pick you up at 10.

All I want for Christmas is an air hockey table. It will go great with my air guitar.