Funny Status Ideas

I got mood poisoning....must have been something I hate.

The best thing about dog is that you can act like something really good just happened and they’ll instantly start celebrating. They have no idea what the context is, they're just always ready to party.

I’m broke ! So when I said “call me if you need anything” I meant, prayer, support & hugs. You know, free stuff.

Dogs are tough. I’ve been interrogating this one for hours and he still won’t tell me who is a good boy.

A big nose is no excuse to not wear a mask. I still wear pants.

One teacher can change your whole life. Like the one that knocked up my cousin.

We used to experiment with launching monkeys into space. Now it is CEOs. Progress.