Funny Status Ideas

If Wonder Woman and Spiderman went into business together would they call it Amazon Web Services?
Would a transformer buy life insurance or car insurance?
I bet it’s pretty hard at a mime’s funeral to figure out when the moment of silence is over.
Maroon is just navy red.
A worm is a pretty disappointing prize for getting up early if you ask me.
‪The Fourth of July was an annual reminder of how useless my dog would be in a war.‬
I sent one of those swabs off for DNA sampling. Apparently, I'm 50% Crest, 25% Denture fixative, 13% kebab, and 12% Rum.
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