Funny Status Ideas

#17170
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Xyuppi
It would be awesome if we had an alarm clock that puts us to sleep instantly at a certain time instead of waking us up.
My debit card is starting to feel like a gift card. "Not sure how much is on this, but we'll give it a try."
As a kid you avoid swearing in front of adults. As an adult you avoid swearing in front of kids.
It's kind of patronizing that a computer asks you to prove you're not a robot.
#17166
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Xyuppi
I’m staring a petition for Barbara Walters to do the Ball Drop next New Year just to hear her say “ I’m Barbara Walters, and this is 2020”
I messed up already. 2020 is going to be my year for sure.
#17164
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Xyuppi
Ever notice that the person who says "See you next year!" on New Years Eve is always someone you wouldn't mind not seeing for the entire year?
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