Funny Status Ideas

Def Leppard is the safest music to air drum to while driving because you can keep one hand on the steering wheel.

The best thing about telepathy is... I know, right!?

It's such a cold winter this year that the squirrels are collecting more nuts than usual. So far 3 of my neighbors have disappeared...

Alarm clocks should come with sounds like “tiny doll feet scampering into the closet” because I am not hitting snooze when I hear that

I'd like to go to Holland someday wooden shoe?

The longer I stay at home, the more homeless I look.

The invention of the shovel was groundbreaking!