Funny Status Ideas

I bet Captain Crunch has some amazing abs.

Home sounds like a nice place, until they say they’re going to put you in one.

I don't care how much you like the soap. Never leave a public restroom smelling your fingers.

‪"Memory foam pillow fights". That's one fight you'll never forget. ‬

I snuck popcorn into the movie theater but they won’t let me use their microwave.

Beyonce's twins will never have to work a day in their life. She should name one of them Lay-Z.

Deja poo..... The feeling that you've heard this crap before