Funny Status Ideas

Whoever figured out the 'days of the month correspond with your knuckles' thing had too much time on their hands

Who named them veterinarians and not "dogtors"?

Your bed is pretty much just a charger for your body

Hello is this HP? I’d like to make a return. I ordered a Laser Jet and you sent me a printer.

The human body is roughly 60% water. I'm not fat, I'm flooded.

I hope I never go to jail because I haven't memorized a phone number since 2001

A German Shepherd named Rumor won the Westminster Dog Show. He will now be breed...aka spreading Rumors.