Funny Status Ideas

How do blind people ever know when they're done wiping?

You matter! Unless you multiply yourself by the speed of light squared...then you energy.

Does ke$ha go by k€sha in Europe?

I got called pretty today! Well actually the full statement was "you're pretty annoying!" But I only focus on positive things

Wake up and smell the Covfefe!

Uni-Ball pens missed one hell of an endorsement opportunity with Lance Armstrong.

Tiger Woods should not have ignored his caddie when he told him to use the driver.