Funny Status Ideas

I wouldn't pay for a personal trainer, but I would pay someone to just knock unhealthy food out of my hands.

T-shirts should come in a size between XL and XXL called "I'm still hoping to turn things around"

I don't care if its a scam! Just the fact that the Prince of Nigeria sends me personal email makes me feel special!

If your house doesn't have house numbers on it, you need to address that situation.

They should make a "How It's Made" episode on how "How It's Made" is made.

It must be annoying for nudists when they have to clean their glasses

If I was Columbia Drug Lord. I'd dye the cocaine black then fill printer toner cartridges with it. I could charge double for toner vs charging for just cocaine. Would be legal too!