Funny Status Ideas

I hate using Drano. You're literally pouring $4.00 dollars down the drain.

I often worry that mankind is going to start World War III soley because we enjoy trilogies.

I just realized that if we drink enough wine, the adult's table will become the kid's table.

If you’re going Black Friday shopping, be a decent human being and turn your phone horizontal before you record any fights.

No matter how many lasagna’s you stack on top of each other, ultimately it’s always just one lasagna

I'm pretty sure all dogs can smell drugs. It's just that most of them aren't snitches.

My dad always used to say, "The sky's the limit!" Which is probably why he got fired from his job at NASA.