Funny Status Ideas

Too bad alcohol isn't heavily discounted the day after St. Patrick's Day the way candy is after Valentine's Day.

You know you've reached adulthood when your bed is in the middle of the wall instead of in the corner.

If wookies have a 400 year life span, then Han Solo is basically like Chewbacca's third dog.

Surgery is just stabbing someone to life.

King: How many volunteers do we have for my evil army? Squire: 384 my liege K: Ok, round them up S: 400 my liege.

I've been diagnosed with a chronic fear of giants. Feefiphobia.

This "Spring Forward" thing would be a lot more popular if we moved the clocks ahead at 2PM on Monday.